You Only Live Once

            Yes, I do realize I just titled my blog a very overused and immature phrase said by rappers and teenagers alike, however there is a legitimate meaning behind it. As you know from my last blog I am loving my time here in The Philippines at Children’s Garden. Since I went to Peru in 2010 I have felt a passion in my heart for missions work. I don’t yet know what Gods plan is for my life, but I am not worried. He will show me when the time is right and until then I only need to listen to his voice daily and trust him. Now it is time for a little story…

            At church on Sunday the pastor was speaking about putting your faith into action. As I was sitting there listening to him it hit me like a bus, ton of bricks, slap in the face or whatever else you want to call it.  In my chair, on the third story of a church, in The Philippines, I had an epiphany. I only get to live this life once. How am I going to do it? Two things instantly crossed my mind. I can live this life for myself which means having very nice things, always wanting more for myself, and always making sure I am comfortable. The other was to live my life for Christ. Such a huge cliché in the Christian world I know, but regardless… I imagined selling everything, living so simply, and doing whatever I could to show people the love of our awesome Lord. (weather in the united states or a foreign country) The story of the young rich man from Matthew 19:16-30 shoved its way into my thoughts. The young man in talking to the Lord and asks him how to earn eternal life outside of obeying the laws because he says he is doing that already. The Lord replied in verse 21 “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then, come, follow me.” Then my mind moved on to the day that I die. It sounds morbid but hear me out, I imagined standing before the Lord and looking back on my life. How beautiful, humbling, and powerful it would be to sit at the feet of the Lord and say “Lord I sacrificed my plans & what the world wanted to bring hope, joy, and love to those that have none so that they may know your name and worship you to the end of the age. I lived a simple life and tried my hardest in my days of living to pour your love onto others so that they may know you are a great and mighty savior.” These thoughts swirled around in my head for a while and I honestly did not even know what to do with them or if I should tell anyone or just keep them bottled up in my mind.

            I am ruined. Absolutely, positively, and utterly ruined for the ordinary. I am okay with that though, I am excited for it, because now I am living without excuse.  I have seen, experienced, and lived with people that will forever change the course of my life. They left and are continuing to leave imprints on my heart that push me to a different life. Weather in the states or in a different country I know now that I cannot live my life the same way I did before.  I must live life always loving recklessly, listening to others, growing closer to God, and telling people about the things he does is my life.

            So in conclusion to my epiphany, I am fired up, but in a really good way. I am excited, a little bit scared, and would love some prayer for what the next chapter of my life looks like.