It sounds so stereotypical. A young Christian girl, fresh out of high school, leaves on a 9 month journey across the globe and is forever changed by the people she encounters and the life she lives…
Well then, I guess I am a stereotype. I didn't realize it every time it happened but over the past 9 months I have changed. Some things that changed were very minor while others were major parts of "me"
When I left for this trip I was so afraid to come home different or "weird". I was afraid to let any part of "me" (that I thought defined my character) go. I was afraid to come home and be a different person. Now I understand why, it is scary to change especially when people at home aren't or are changing in a different way.
Standing where I am now, looking back, I am so mad at myself for thinking like that. It has been so good to change. To be honest, I think the kind of transformation I needed could only come with this radical trip. I only could change to be more of the woman of Christ I should be by being completely removed from life as I knew it. The way I think and act now is different then before I left for this trip.
I am still the same Lexi Coco in so many ways (don't worry) but at the same time I am a more confident, godly, loving, softer, and a better version of myself. A "Lexi 2.0" if you will. I needed this trip more than I could have ever understood before I left. I was so caught up in what society told me was important. I was so focused on things that matter, but don't matter as much as The Lord. I was scared. I was sassy and I'm sure it hurt people. I was negative. I was not bold. I was so many things… I am sure when I get home I will have times of falling back into my old self and my old character traits but hopefully not for long. I also am still a work in progress with things that need to change and that I'm working on changing. When I return home I desire to keep growing in The Lord and changing or letting The Lord "prune" my branches as needed. I want that so that I can continue to become a person that more closely imitates Jesus's character every single day.
As an encouragement for the people at home: sometimes you can feel The Lord wanting to change you or your convicted that you need to change but something keeps you from doing it… It could be that you feel like you should be spending more time with God, switching friend groups because your current friends drag you down, it could be doing more to further the kingdom, it could be letting go of old things in your life, mending relationships with family or pretty much anything else. BUT back to the point. Whatever it is, seek some wise counsel and do what you need to do to let The Lord change you. I promise it's so worth it. It might be the hardest thing you do but I've never met a person that regrets getting one step closer to The Lord by doing the right thing.
I love you and we are so proud of you! Love everything you wrote and cant I wait for us to spend time with you and hear more of All your adventures. Love Uncle Paul and Aunt Kathy Shallyn. And Mark. Oooh we got a new puppy lola died 🙁 but our little Bella is adorable cant wait for you to meet her.
Coco you are so awesome!!!! So proud of you and all you are doing. I love reading your blogs and am so inspired by all that God is teaching you. Love you and can’t wait to hear about it even more, so soon!!
…just so you know my love…as long as you are willing to submit to the process…our Father will allow us to go through change…it’s painful, exhilarating, scary and surprising…at least for me…because I keep thinking I am “getting it”, only to find I have so much more to learn! But I will say it makes life exciting…the key for me has been learning, with the help of some amazing mentors…that it all comes down to getting in agreement with Him…about EVERYTHING! No matter how seemingly insignificant, it matters to Him! You are so much wiser than I was at your age…you go my precious girl!
Amen sister! It will be a forever thing until the Lord perfects us in His way! So stoked you are “getting it” at a young age. You are an amazing young woman, and are more amazing each day because of what God is doing in your life! Love you Lexi! See you SOOO SOON!
My darling girl:
I have been praying for you and am so glad to hear from you again. Even at my age, I am learning that
I need to change and become more loving, caring,
humble, non-judgmental, etc. I don’t think we ever
arrive., at least I don’t think I will until I am with Him
in heaven. I know the Lord is becoming so near and
dear to you, sweetheart, and I am so impressed with
your maturity and commitment to Him. Love, GAM
Lexi girl, you have grown so much…your wisdom and insight is amazing! So many of us spend a whole lifetime learning the lessons you are getting so early. I think that may be the whole point…to spend a lifetime learning that He is faithful and will use so many people and experiences (positive & negative) to draw us closer to Him. BTW, you are anything but a stereotype and we could not be more proud of you!!! Love you and keeping you in our daily prayers.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard it phrased that way before. Like a 2.0 version…but I like that. Like a better version of you, but you are still yourself. Can’t believe all the things the Lord has shown you in a very short amount of time. Blessed to see how much He has been growing you!
Hi Lexi,
Your blog entries are heartfelt and expressive. I’ve enjoyed reading of your worldly expansion, in many respects. As you well know, I’ve always been an advocate of world awareness. This stint of 9 mos. for you is “just the beginning” and you should be just ever so excited by what the world has to offer.
May God continue to lead you in so many wonderful directions. I look forward to when we once again meet. Perhaps at a most special June event?! 😉
Onward! ~Linda
You said it: “let The Lord change you.” What I have discovered over many years is that we are powerless to change ourselves apart from Him. (Heck, we don’t even know what “good” looks like unless He shows us! So how do we even know how we should change even if we wanted to?) All anyone who was ever a true success in the Lord ever did was say, “yes” to Him. I am glad that you said “yes” and that you found that it’s good to say “yes” to Him. The closer that you get to a holy God, the more aware you become of your unholiness (cf. Isaiah 6). But that is a good and necessary step, because we tend to think that we’ve got a lot of “being good” “handled” . . . until we really encounter God. I can’t tell you how good it is that you are learning this now. A lot of us waste a lot of our lives trying to God’s will our way. I am hopeful that you are not going to do that. Love you!